Whilst I was enjoying my Sunday afternoon, it occurred to me that I slightly annoy my daughter. I thought on this for a minute. I mean I was only singing “100 Bottles of Beer on the Wall” to kill time while I was working. My boss would be so pleased. My children often seem to be annoyed by something that I do. I mentally made a list..which amused me. So here is the top 10:
10. Chores-It is my job, as the mother, to give them responsibility. Plus, I mean I do work. I don’t have time to do it all, and children need these skills in life. However, that doesn’t stop them from groaning every time I say, “Go feed the chickens and make sure they have water.”
9. Make them spend time with me. – You would think they would enjoy my company. Someone has to give me a good reason to watch Goonies or Drop Dead Fred. I know how many times we’ve seen them, but they are classics. Plus, it’s quality time and I am the boss.
8. Calling them by the wrong name. – Any mother of more than one kid knows what I mean. It happens. Especially with twins. Sometimes the wrong kid’s name comes out. Ummmm…yeah, get over it children.
7. Correcting their speech. – Just because we are hillbillies, doesn’t mean that I will allow my children to speak that way. They do not have “feets”. We did not “eated” dinner. That’s right, I’m the meanie who told them they sound uneducated when they don’t speak correctly. Oh yeah, don’t care.
6. Refer to my dog as their little brother. – I love my dog, but I do know he’s not a human. He is, however, part of the family. Honestly, I enjoy knowing they get mad when I tell them to take their little brother out to pee.
5. Lay down on one of their beds. – Ok, so they don’t wanna leave their room to hang out with me. I just go to them. Plus, they each got a new mattress last year. They are REALLY comfy. Unfortunately, one of my children has a slight OCD thing where his bed must be made the minute he gets up. That isn’t a bad thing, but he gets really, really angry if someone wrinkles his comforter..or moves his pillow…
4. “Borrow” their toys. – I mean, it’s not like I’m going to keep them. You borrow one little t-rex for an Elf on the Shelf prop and all of a sudden, you are a thief. Dude, chill.
3. Play my music too loud. – I mean, how many kids would love it if Mom blasted music? Good music. My kids? Of course not. Yeah, well, I pay the electricity, I buy the video games, and I can play my music loud if I want to.
2. Swing around in my desk chair yelling, “weeeeeeeee.” – I waited my whole life to be a grown up with a desk and a chair with wheels that allows me to do this. I know it’s silly, but it’s fun. They should really try it sometime. I’d even let them use my chair.
1. Drum roll? I break out into random song. (Yup, singing loudly.) – In the car. In the kitchen. In Wal Mart. Don’t care. I know I can’t sing. I just enjoy it. You’d think since I’ve been doing it since they were hearing this while still in my stomach, they’d be over this one by now. However, it is still the most annoying thing in the world to them.