I love funny memes.  I love pictures of my friends and family.  I love baby announcements, job announcements, and good news.  I love inspirational quotes.  (“These Are A Few of My Favorite Things” going through my head.)  Now, here is what I hate…the things that exhaust me and make me stop looking at Facebook!

  1. Minions.  I know the whole world loves them, but I think they are ugly little creatures.  My kids enjoy them though. lol
  2. Starving, abused animal post.  If you want to save an animal, please google your local shelter, and do not put a big, dark, depressing cloud over my day.
  3. Tag 5 beautiful ladies…copy and paste and tag 5 friends.  No thanks.  It’s like a chain letter.  Thank you, but no thank you.   I am perfectly fine if no one ever tells me I’m one of their 5 people.  Then, if I get tagged, I have to feel guilty that I just clicked “like” and didn’t spread the nonsense.
  4. If you are reading this and you are my friend….No one will read this, but if you do….It’s like begging people to notice you.  It’s annoying to read, and I am certainly not spreading that junk.  I ain’t even clicking “like” on that ridiculousness!
  5. Anti abortion/negative political/let’s all find something to fight about post.  If you want to post something funny about the election..great, I love a good laugh.  If you have a positive post for your candidate, awesome.  Otherwise, I don’t want to read a post about how partial birth abortion happens. Is Facebook really the place to learn how that works if you don’t already know? NO.  Nobody wants to see that mess!  Plus, this election will be over soon, how many good friends are we all gonna lose before then?
  6. One million likes and Jesus will bless you if you clicked like…you get the point.  Ummm I’m no expert, but I don’t think Jesus is real big on facebook.  If you need to talk to Jesus, talk to him directly.  If you post that, you aren’t really posting it for Jesus, are you? You feel called to post a bible verse? GREAT, do it!  Please don’t post morbid pics of a bloody man hanging on a cross dripping blood.  I hated the ones my mother put on the wall of her living room as a child.  Just creepy.  I did not feel close to God looking at them.  Gave me that same creepy feeling as “Unsolved Mysteries” did when I heard the theme music.
  7. Copy and paste this and you will get money from a gozillionaire giving away his fortune.  GET A FREAKING JOB IF YOU WANT MONEY. Just sayin’.  And if you believe that post, you deserve the let down you get when you don’t have  a million dollars sitting in your bank account. (At least that’s what I tell my teenagers.)
  8. Now, I’m all about embarrassing my kids.  I love to tell my 8 year old I love him (really loud, while calling him “Baby”) while he’s playing online with his friends.  I really do.  Should I be posting to all of our friends and family that my children pissed me off and I grounded them cause I’m a good mom because I punish them?  That’s not fun embarrassment, that’s family business.  I don’t wanna hear that someone else’s kid is bad.
  9. I understand if you wanna post that the whole family had flu last week. (Let’s me know that I do not wanna come to your house!) I do not want to know that you sprained your ankle and that it still hurts the next day and you have a headache and that you still have a headache while your stomach hurts the next day.  I mean, not to be rude, but you can only get so sick until you die!  I know people who are sick, please stop looking for attention by daily acting like you have an excuse to be lazy and nap. (I am not talking about people with actual health problems.) If you are that bad off, please see a doctor as you really must be dying!
  10. If you have a problem with your significant other, tell your significant other.  Why do you want everyone you know to be mad at your boyfriend?  Tomorrow, y’all will be happy again and the whole world thinks he’s an ass.  Do us all a favor, save the drama for your BFF on the phone…or TELL THE BOYFRIEND. (girlfriend, spouse, etc etc)  These are usually the same people who can’t figure out why everyone is always in their business!


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